~ end of hope, end of life ~

It has ended. They are not coming back, farewell to all onboard of MH 370. May your transition to another life are smooth and easy, insyaAllah.

~ crazy musing ~

Its been ages since last I post any entry. Shows how lazy I am in updating stuff. Well, not much to tell anyway.
Started my new chapter already, and its looking good, not great but things are moving, pages being flipped and more words are written.
Moving on, I've been observing life and people. Nowadays, with all the rising price of goods and services, it is getting harder to survive. I mean you still can afford some stuff, necessary items but to live comfortably is hard.
Even getting a job is harder these days.  Some companies offered low salaries, but want those with experience of more than a year! I thought for those who have a degree, they could get a starting salary of 2.5k but companies offered these range of salaries to those having 5-6 years of experience. How are they going to survive? Having family cost money, children cost money and the parent wants to give the best to their kids but its looking tougher everyday.
Even the house prices are ridiculously high, its so crazy that the developers putting expensive prices in this economic downturn. Local people will not be able to afford it, not without working for more than 10 years. But they offered low salary too!
For the fresh grads, when will they afford to buy a house then?
Financial support,  Br1m? Oh puh-lease! Its barely enough for a month of expenses, let alone to help in absence of the subsidy that been pull back.
And now with the missing plane that has yet to be found, moneys been pouring out to pay for the searches, expenses for the family members and lots of other stuff, it didnt look good for the people in the near future.
GST? Oh no, not another disaster. Disaster? you ask me, of course it is. There's so little to save with the income, now we have to pay more? Yes, other countries has implemented GST but they give back to the people. Its sort of income to the country because they might not have other industries to rely upon. This country is rich with all sorts of industries, our oil and gas industry is supposed to be a lucrative business that should able to support the people yet we still pay more for petrol.
Agriculture, we have a rich land that can harvest a lot of things. And yet the palm oil prices keep falling and those who suffered are villagers whose main source of income came from it.
Our economy are being control by people who did not care for other people, their only thought are just to get as much money as possible into their own bank account, no matter whether by using the legal ways or the opposite.
People been suffering man, do something!
I dont think they care at all, despite what they said.
Look at that, so much rambling and complaints. Did you do something to change it, do your parts as concern citizens aina? I dont think so, so stop this ridiculous complaints and do your parts!

ai-na : thats it from me for today, sorry if you cant accept all of the the above but thats my thoughts. I'm free to voice it out,  so shut up! :P

~ the end, the beginning ~

The journey to my adventure has come to an end. I said my goodbye to good ole England,  I learnt a lot over there and gain lots of friends along the way.
Its another chapter in my life that has come to an end and for me to start a new chapter,  a new adventure.
Hopefully this new chapter will bring joy and happiness in my life and make me a better person.

~ counting days ~

Less then a month now for my ACCA exam. Its a bit daunting,  the feeling of anxiety. No matter what, I have to pass all my paper this time around, therefore, it's mean practice and practice everyday. When going to revision class last week, I feel like I can do it but I'm not so sure with ACCA because the last time I can do it too but I fail. This time I have to pray and hope I will succeed.
Today's revision class is not easy at all, I don't understand a thing.  I feel lost all of the sudden now when before this I understand the material. The point of going to this revision class is to actually find what mistakes I made in my past exam but now I am left scrambling around my head trying to figure out the materials for today.
Major problem!!!
Guess I have to practice more :(

~ alone ~

moving to a new place can be quite daunting to some people, especially if you're alone. yeah, you guest right, i'm in new place now all alone! manchester, the home to the famous football club Manchester United. not that i'm a fan or anything but it gave certain vibes being in the famous place, who doesnt know where manchester is.

i know i've been neglecting this blog for almost a year now, so what, i'm busy! haha, yeah right, busy doing nothing that is. well, not that studying means nothing but i have to keep my priorities straight. it doesnt get the result that i wanted with all the studying that i done but i believed that every cloud has it silver linings. it just not meant to be yet so i have to be patient and continue on and not to ever give up.

i'm not good with giving verses of Qur'an or hadith and i do not dare do that without any studies, therefore everything i wrote here is what i perceived in life and people around me. so if you want to add in or correct me, please do so anytime.

i always get off track, aren't i? yep, i dont even know what i'm writing about now.
ooh, i want to share my new purchased. i bought this a few days ago and so very excited to use it. i know some of you might think, 'what's the deal?' but like i said before, random things intrigued me.



beautiful isn't it? my new baby!

yep, i have lots of babies.

okie dokie, need to go now for Zuhur prayer than off to lunch and maybe some groceries later, oh no, some needed groceries. where's my list??

ai-na : need to find some friends here...

~ nothing and everything ~

i love to write, draw sometimes but it takes time and boredom to finish it. that is why my blog has been empty for so long. so today i want to write about nothing and everything, since i have no idea where to start anyway. i'll have my exam in a few weeks, and i have to pass all three paper. it is crucial for me to pass therefore i need to study but i'm lazy, well anyone who knows me will know this. my life is boring because i'm a boring person anyway so nothing exciting happen, maybe someday when i become less boring. how to become less boring anyway? i need to find a job too to support myself as well as work experience, finding job is hard! what am i good at? its summer now so the weather is hotter. i like it sunny as its beautiful but i prefer winter because i love snow! i miss the last snow because i was back in malaysia but its alright i have my share of snow before in exeter. the best thing about summer is you do not have to think what coat you need to wear or if it clashes with any other colour you might wear that day. summer is about colours, lots of colours much like in spring time minus the rain. the sun was shining this morning, and the sky is clear, blue and clear. birds were singing and all is very peaceful. i can see the horses grazing at the field nearby as i cycle to town. oh look, the rabbit want to come out and play too! its a beautiful day and i would love to just lay down under that big tree on top of the hill, reading. maybe some other time, i've got work to do. alright then, want to continue sleeping!

ai-na : nothing and everything...

~ Of needs and wants ~

Really need to prioritise my life. Been having this feelings that i want a lot of things in life that most of them isn't actually a necessity, but can't stop from yearning it. I want this and that because this will help me in this and that but we should actually learn to appreciate what we have and use it according to our needs. And thats the problem, sometimes i fell like all of it is what i need. Ok, i'm blabbering now.
Here's the thing, i really want to travel, go to europe and lots of other places. My friends asked me to join them to Portugal. Portugal! Never have a thought of going there, not anywhere in my list of places to visit! Sorry people of Portugal! But then its sound wonderful, you know a place you haven't thought of going, you'll get a chance to explore and learn new stuff other than a place you already have in mind which you knew about them quite a lot already.
And the dilemma is the money! Yes, i think nowadays people have a lot of dilemma or should i say problem with money written all over it. If i decide to join them and go to Portugal, i'll be in a very tight spot the next few months not to say i have to save and try not to spend too much on food as i really like to eat, a lot. Oh dear! I know that if ask my parent, the answer is a definite NO. No need to ask to know the answer already, they will say that i should focus studying. Oh money, why can't i just grow them in my backyard!

ai-na : revision started already...

~ new house ~

Finally moving into our own house. Lots of cleaning to be done, which have yet to finish. Boxes arrived from Exeter but still half unpacked, so tired. There's lot to buy to make it more like a home but will get there eventually.
Went to play Laser Tag last night, super fun but tiring as well. Really hope can play again but not so sure as its a bit expensive, anyway the experience is great.
Revisions already started but yet to study, need to focus now because this is important. Hopefully can get the study table soon so can start to study properly.

ai-na : continue unpacking...

~ itsy bitsy spider ~

urgh, 2 days ago i need to use the toilet badly but the one upstairs is occupied so i have to use the one downstairs which i didnt know exist until that time. when i opened the door, spiders scurried away from every corner of the toilet! there is no way i'll use that toilet.
i dont care how small and tiny the spiders are, i hate them! i just do not like them at all, not one of them, not even spider-man even though he's handsome and cute, he still got those spidery power whats so ever!

ai-na : i do not want to cure my phobia!

~ hot or warm? ~

29.9C! hottest day in the UK, ever. just cant wait for winter, snow is more fun. doing totally nothing today, been very unproductive. need to change that. just sent my application yesterday, hope all will be well. i think i want to go for a picnic tomorrow in Hyde Park or maybe St James Park, just sitting and enjoying the day, maybe read some books or better yet, studying!

ai-na : keep moving foward, glance back just as a reminder...

~ nothing to do ~

other than studying, which i didnt do, i'm bored! even internet doesnt give my any temptation. movies, facebook, fictions, nothing!
better go to sleep!

~ a hectic life ~

life past by without a pause button. class started and now almost finish, its mean studying time for me. need to reorganise my time.

~ moving out ~

it is time of the year (for me) when i have to move out of the house and move someplace else. this time always reminds me of how i hate packing! everytime i will remind myself, next time Aina DO NOT buy so much stuff or keep unnecessary things around, you will not have much space to store them and you'll end up with lots of boxes when moving out, urgh! life as it is still go on, no matter how many time i moaned and whined around, still got to decide where to live next, when and where to move my stuffs and all the related things.

now, ramadhan is leaving us, hope we got to see it again next year. this year eid will be quite different, a lot i think, my first time celebrating eid on my own without my family and without the great food. this is so sad, my Abah already planned to skype on the first day of eid and i know i will cry! a test for me as a student and as a part of being muslim, i should be proud of it.

well, i should continue packing.

ai-na : should be more active here...

~ Ramadhan Mubarak ~

Wow, it's been a while since my last post. With all the things happened around i cant seem to find the time to write some (lazy!!!) but there's a lot been happening since then.
First, my Abah are well and recovered now, Alhamdulillah! He still got tired and cannot exert himself too much, but Dr Hilmi said its because of the medicine, he is fine and can go back to his normal routine but the medicine wants him to rest. At the very least, I got to spend some times at home with all my family since i'm not celebrating Eid with them this year. Huhu! Next came my graduation! Wow, i'm finally done with degree, cant believe it! My family came over here, so i took them around. I am excited and happy and relieved that i finally able to take my Abah to places he want to go. Places that he already since before i came here, he already knew the history of that place, what in it and everything. So i'm pleased that he got to see those places with such limited time. Another exciting things is I manage to bring my sister to Old Trafford, woohoo!


I think what my family enjoy the most is shopping, they shop for shoes as if they want to open a store back home! So cool! Haha. And then it was my graduation ceremony. It was beautiful and eventful. I am happy to be able to take my Ummi and Abah to see me graduate and hopefully it will make them proud of me.

And now Ramadhan has arrived. I hope that i can improved myself and be a better muslim that can contribute not only to the people around me but also the world.

ai-na : Pray for my success in the future..

~ plan and decision ~

No matter how thorough and well-planned your plan is, in the end the decision is not in our hand. Things happened out of sudden, even you cant predict anything, no one can. No matter how much we want tomorrow to come, can we be sure that we will still be here to see it, to meet tommorow? When something happened out of sudden, it can staggered you to think back on how ungrateful you have been all this time. We've been ignorant, not because we do not know but because we chose not to. Arrogant, all of us. We became so sure of ourselves, acting all powerful and mighty. When the truth is we are nobody! I think when things happened to us, we should be thankful, grateful that we still got the chance to repent, to ask for forgiveness and to improve ourselves. Life is all about improvement, your day today should be better than yesterday and tomorrow should be better than today. How, you ask me? Look into yourself and you may find the answer.
Oh yes, i am now unofficially finished my degree! Now i can fully enjoy the word freedom, been waiting for this since i was in standard 6. I remembered that day when we finish our primary school exam, we all were overjoy and shouting 'freedom' then our teacher said, we have yet to be free. There are still other big exam throughout our schooling, way to damper our spirit i tell you! But this time, this is freedom! I'm so going to miss being a student, even though i'm still going to continue my study after this, i think the feeling will be different, dont you think?
Oh, i got lots to tell about my trip but maybe next time. Got to wait for those pictures as well.

ai-na : pray to Allah for Abah's full recovery, he didnt forget you Abah!

~ amazing race! and open house? ~

Amazing Race? Yes, oh not the one in the TV but in Exeter! Organized but our own Malaysian Society as one of their biggest event, a success if you ask me! Starting at 1030 in Cornwall House and it took us about 4 hours to finish the course. Super tiring and very exciting! There's about 8 team with 2 to 3 members each, my team are me ( obviously!) kak Irfana and her hubby, abg Ali. What a great team too! We are the first team to leave the base, and the first checkpoint is up the hill! The clue to the next checkpoint is confusing, to me it is as i cant figure out where that place is. We are the last team to reach the 2nd checkpoint, i almost give up, thought of saying 'lets just go home, i'm hungry anyway' and a few other teams can be seen passing us to their next checkpoint, way to damper our mood but luckily we tried again and we did it. We found the 2nd checkpoint! Wonder why i cant figure out that place? Well, i never been to that area before and suddenly feel like first year again. Haha! And wonder of wonder, we speed up after that. We did all the task given at each checkpoint quickly and swiftly too! Oh, there are 10 checkpoint to finish by the way. I cant believe it myself when we manage to do it so quickly. The tasks are all funny and weird too. There's one where we were given a picture, they tell us that we need to take picture of the object in the picture given to us with precision, same angle, same spot and same everything! Know what we got? Hand dryer! Guess where we can find it? In the public toilet of course! oh how people think i'm some weird person taking picture in the toilet! But i did it, 3 try is all it takes to get the exact picture. I'm proud of myself even with those funny look directed my way. There also this one task in Gandy Street, if you dont know Diagon Alley was inspired based on that street, with the history you can guess the task there. 3 different spells from Harry Potter and we have to cast the spell so the taskmaster can film it. Embarassing!
The second last checkpoint task is questions about Exeter, it is so hard too luckily we managed to answer it as they only need the best 3 out of 10. We are the first team to finish all task and was targeted to be the winner where the final checkpoint is at the Imperial, alas we didnt make it because we are all tired and cant run all the way from the quay to impe. We managed to get 1st runner up by mere 10 seconds from the winner. Its actually a luck as Angie is no where to be found, we are the third team to reach impe by the way but Angie is very good at
hiding so none of us can find her at first. Even though we didnt won the first place and the £60 prize, we still happy and tired! What a great day!
Open house? Not anything special, i just thought of cooking something and invite almost everybody to my house. It was a busy day but fun too as everybody tend to get to know each other and share stories. The food are good too, and everyone enjoy it ( i hope so).

ai-na : thanks k irfana and her husband, we make a great team dont you think?

~ flirting with my mind ~

I just realised that my post for the past few months are all about me and what I mostly did in my life, but nothing from what I get from it. Well, I think I have to keep searching and reflect it back.

ai-na : baking...

~ exam and new term ~

fuh!! exam was fine, quite hard but alright, wish i study more. really, i wish i study more of it, hopefully i 'll learn my lesson to study early and study more for my next exam. hopefully, the results will be fine and i past all my papers.

day after exam, i went to Bristol to enjoy before the start of term. the initial plan is to go eat, because a friend of mine said there's lot of Halal food there, but we spend the day walking around Bristol City. it's so big! the clifton suspension bridge, the must-see attraction in Bristol is on top of a hill so we have to climb a very steep hill, my legs and back ached. since we went there on sunday, there are no sunday service bus in the city (we didn't know!!) so we have to use our foot to go around or taxi. overall, the trip was great and i really enjoy it. that's the point right!

last week is the first week of term, so class started as usual. i just have 3 modules this term, so hopefully not too busy as last year. therefore, i planned to use all the extra hours to study more (new year resolution!) really need to study hard this term as this is my final term. i started working as a babysitter as well this term, ooh baby! i'm very nervous that day because i never change a nappies before, and luckily the baby i care for, Farouq, didn't need nappy change the time i care for him. but he cried the whole morning because he doesn't like me! well, he didn't know me yet. crying then sleeping in my arm, woke up and cried again then sleep then woke up and cried again. i got him watched me eat my lunch and he stop crying. now, don't say i'm cruel or what for not feeding him, i offered (not my food, his baby food) and he don't want to eat. Until his mum got home, then he want to smile. see, he doesn't like me!

oh, on saturday i went to Exmouth and Sidmouth. it's a very nice and exciting excursion! at least this time around i'm covering Devon area instead of outside of Devon and it's cheaper too. well, i planned to go to Dartmoor later but still not sure when, i'll keep it in the planner.

ai-na : how wonderful to go around places, just if you have enough money!

~snow, holiday and study for exam~

what a great winter in Exeter! so much snow this year, i'm having lots of fun playing in the snow and building snowman. i'm so glad i bought my hiking boots because of the thick snow, compare to last year. see my snow man, the name Abu!
oh yeah, winter means holiday as well, that means study weeks and exam is around the corner! oh my, i haven't started anything yet!!! well, since the snow are quite heavy, lots of travel route including the airports are closed. i just went to Plymouth last week and our train being delayed. but i like snow so i don't mind much unless you thought of going somewhere.

well, i got 3 exam and 1 test, hopefully will do well in all of it.

ai-na : study plan has been drawn but...

~busy-ness~

who's the busiest in the world? bees of course! why? cant you hear? they alway buzzing 'busy, busy, busy' hahaha
yeah, very lame, i know! these 2 weeks are the most busiest for me, because of the assignments and test. i barely can handle it! well, hopefully everything went well.

ai-na : 1 done, 2 more to go..